blog of sam and skaja

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Marriage So Far

Very soon, Skaja and I will be exchanging the wedding rings that I hope we’ll be wearing for the rest of our lives. We got legally married in British Columbia, Canada this May, but didn’t have rings to exchange with each other until later so we’re going to have a small ceremony and a celebration with some close friends. Our relationship has seen some troubles, but I think that for the most part, we’ve been doing well for ourselves and that we’ve been good for each other. Skaja has pushed me to break a lot of barriers that I had raised around myself. I’ve done my best to share the thoughts that I use to keep myself calm and collected with Skaja to allow her to stay centered and stable enough to accomplish the things that she hopes to do. We’ve given each other someone to care about and take care of that we both dearly needed. We’ve spent so much time sharing ourselves and our environment with each other and changed each other enough that neither of is is the same person we were before; that each one of us is the part of the other that has always been missing.

When I got married, I knew that Skaja and I would be taking our two separate lives weaving them into one. That we would become accountable to each other and that we would have to communicate and work out our differences, but there were other things that took me by surprise. It demands more trust than I ever thought I would extend to any human being other than my parents. It has meant that there’s another person with more influence over me than I thought I would allow anyone to have ever. It’s led me to tolerate and deal with issues that I thought I had refused to ever allow into my life again. It has given me a new perspective on me and forced me to see some flaws in my character that I’ve been more than willing to pay any price to ignore until I finally learned that when someone loves you and you do something wrong, they pay the price when you do something wrong. I hope to be able to apply that lesson to my relationships with other people I love.

I try very hard to not take it for granted that she’ll always be there no matter what and to not lose sight of all of the things that she brings into my life. I try to make sure that I’m always finding things of value to offer her and that I’m making myself into a better partner for her and myself. I hope that as we change, we’ll be able to keep communicating with each other and making the best of the circumstances that we find ourselves in and that we step forward to meet our life; building and shaping it to make it our own.

My Rather Odd Afternoon

I thought that Skaja and I should try a new place for lunch, and Panda Express has food, tasty food. Sounds like a situation that would result in a nice lunch, right? I thought so. I was wrong.

It turns out that while the the location we’d driven to is listed on google maps, it had closed quite a while ago. I decided not to let that stop the two of us from enjoying tasty Chinese goodness so I searched for the next nearest location and dialed the number to make sure that it was open, it wasn’t. The next listing, while an open restaurant with people answering the phones, was too far to drive so we would go somewhere else. We would go to Einstein’s Bagels, where I hadn’t been in a very long time and we could settle for a while to talk out some things that are going on in the studio.

We went into Einstein’s, decided what we would have, and learned that we couldn’t have it, they were out of plain bagels and panini bread. We made substitutions, got our drinks and learned that they were going to close in ten minutes, so they would pack our food up in a bag for us so we could eat in the parking lot. Awesome.

So one might think that I would know a thing or two about handling liquids in a car properly. Ha! Actually, it seems that I’m destined to douse the interior of each car that we own with a different sticky liquid. Today, that liquid happened to be root beer. Seriously root beer, fuck you. What makes you think you can spill all over the place like that?

That moment turned out to be a transition from bad to good oddly enough, because while I was sitting there in my car with the stuff drying out on me and getting sticky, I just had to laugh. I laughed harder than I had in a long time and the swearing in the car tapered off to a normal level.

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